It’s my birthday on May 26 and I’m turning 62. My daughter is turning 26 this year. I was 36 when I had her and it’s been 36 years year since I was 26. May 26 has some synchronicity to it. The 6-2 is 2-6 backwards. I wondered, what was I really like at 26?
I dug into my old journals to see what was going inside my mind. (Yes, I’ve kept a journal since I was about 13 – it was like therapy for me. I could share my feelings without judgement). So, found what was going on in my world at 26 in 1986!
Ha! I was a hot mess really up until then. Let me tell you, I was so shallow, selfish and so immature. All I cared about was how I looked, who looked at me and when was I getting married! 🙄
(Didn’t get married until I was 35 by the way…. took a while for me to get my life in order to be a wife and mother).
On my birthday in 1986, when I turned 26, I wrote:
Well, here I go again. So much racing thru my mind. I’ve just got to stop and reflect. Here I lay on my blanket in the park, listening to Susan Taylor and with my Bible. The sun and spiritual words are feeding my soul.
My God, look at how my views changed since I am 26! “Pain is the breaking to your understanding.”
I go on and write a letter to myself and my girl friends about the importance of being true to yourself and being guided by God. I talk about not falling into the pitfalls of the “man trap” and to learn to really love yourself and never give up on your dreams.
I thought I pretty deep. LOL. I ended my journal entry talking about the power of GOD to engulf your soul. “Take the power and control your own life. No one else can do it for you. Take the power and make YOUR life happy. Quit waiting on other people to validate you! Take back your power, take control!”
Was Janet Jackson’s “Control” out then? OMG. Yes, it was. LOL! I was a listening to Susan Taylor and Janet Jackson at the same time! That’s what you get at 26… a young woman looking for herself and coming into her own – not taking no mess from men! Living Life Out the Box and taking control! Thanks Janet!
So, here I am a 62. Looking through these journals and seeing clues to my life – and not surprised how it’s turning out. I pretty much have been manifesting my dreams. I write out my goals, do the vision boards, put in the work, make the connections – and God brings it all to fruition.
I don’t stress out as much at 62. I tell my 25 (about to be 26 year old daughter): It’s going to be all right. Don’t you worry ’bout a thang. (In my Stevie Wonder voice). I know it’s going to be all right. I hear another song.
One thing I know for sure, is that God had and has my back. I see how I wrote down that I wanted to own my own PR agency, magazine and broadcast station. Didn’t know how that was going to happen but it has. I’m debuting the Leading Edge Network in July on Roku and the Speakers Magazine is five years old… going strong. My PR firm celebrated 22 years this year! I’m blessed to follow my passion and make a difference doing what I love.
Though on my timetable I thought I should have married ten years earlier than I did, but God knew….keep the faith, trust, believe and it always works out. Better than we planned! Those 36 years between 26 and 62 proved that!
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